Question:
Hi Kim! << How have people on the dating scene (with happy endings, please!) disclosed their MS??????? >> I always told right away. When I told my present boyfriend, he told his doctor. This moron told him I wasn’t going to live very long! That was 13 years ago. I won’t dance on that doctor’s grave, as I said I would, but my boyfriend is still with me. I believe your man *will see you and not the MS. Mine did. Sylvia
Response:
Kim…tell him. How can a relationship be real if one is hiding something? Real life shouldn’t be a soap opera. Real life should be….well, real life. If a person can’t handle someone else’s disease now, they damn sure ain’t gonna hang around later. Wouldn’t you want to know? Tick *****Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened***** http://community.webtv.net/OLTICK/GTakaTICKsWEBPAGE
Response:
Hi Kim, I met my wife (married in 94) in 92. When things started to become serious (later in 93), I told her of my diagnosis in 91. During 93, I was mostly in remission (was RR then, SP now). Diagnosis was changed to SP in 97 – she is still here… In article <n9oo4.1887$LC4.44…@bgtnsc04-news.ops.worldnet.att.net>, "Kim" <kimzinn…@worldnet.att.net> wrote:
| How have people on the dating scene (with happy endings, please!) disclosed | their MS??????? — Take care James (#11)
Response:
On Fri, 11 Feb 2000 00:07:08 GMT, jbridg…@home.com (James Bridges) wrote: >Hi Kim, >I met my wife (married in 94) in 92. When things started to become serious >(later in 93), I told her of my diagnosis in 91. During 93, I was mostly >in remission (was RR then, SP now). Diagnosis was changed to SP in 97 – >she is still here…
James, You put a slight twist on the axiom of relationships. Kim finds herself wanting a lasting relationship but appears to be pressed to tell the medical situation. Donn
Response:
On Thu, 10 Feb 2000 17:09:35 -0600 (CST), OLT…@webtv.net (G T) wrote: >Kim…tell him. How can a relationship be real if one is hiding >something? Real life shouldn’t be a soap opera. Real life should >be….well, real life. >If a person can’t handle someone else’s disease now, they damn sure >ain’t gonna hang around later. >Wouldn’t you want to know? >Tick
Tick, Agreed. Little or nothing comes from hiding a truth, especially, where a future is abticipated. If it ain’t to be, it won’t be. Donn
Response:
I took her post to be: | How have people on the dating scene (with happy endings, please!) disclosed | their MS??????? For me, it was a natural progression, as our relationship grew. (One of the things we both valued was honesty…) In article <38a460a1.605…@news1.cheetah.net>, Remove underscore wrote:
| Kim finds herself wanting a lasting relationship but | appears to be pressed to tell the medical situation. — Take care James (#11)
Response:
- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -On Fri, 11 Feb 2000 01:08:26 GMT, dciREM…@cheetah.net wrote: >On Fri, 11 Feb 2000 00:07:08 GMT, jbridg…@home.com (James Bridges) wrote: >>Hi Kim, >>I met my wife (married in 94) in 92. When things started to become serious >>(later in 93), I told her of my diagnosis in 91. During 93, I was mostly >>in remission (was RR then, SP now). Diagnosis was changed to SP in 97 – >>she is still here… >James, >You put a slight twist on the axiom of relationships. >Kim finds herself wanting a lasting relationship but >appears to be pressed to tell the medical situation. >Donn
What is "abticipated"?
Response:
Hi Chris, Point taken: yes I have actually established a couple of friendships where things didn’t work out otherwise, and this relationship did start originally with me "thinking" that this was where it was headed— but "whammmo"…! 
Kim Chris Fincham wrote in message
<200002101319.IAA21…@mail.peterboro.net>…> Kim, sorry – this won’t help you but it’s something I wonder about almost – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->every time I read a post on MS & romance. What’s wrong with meeting men & >becoming FRIENDS with them? Why do women so often seem to think of men (aka >human beings) in terms of "gimme’ a legal lifetime commitment – or get lost"? >If you approach men first & foremost as potential future friends (which they >should be before you even *consider* marriage…) there’s no need to hide >your MS – in fact, there’s no need to hide anything about yourself. If >romance subsequently happens, great – your new lover already knows all your >bumps & warts. If romance doesn’t happen, that’s also great – because you >still have a good friend, you still get to enjoy male companionship and >:-) male friends are hands-down *the best* way to meet new men! >Chris(tine) F >"and always remember – though you may not yet be soaring high above the >ground, neither are you laying six feet beneath it." > from ‘Theory of Flight’
Response:
Kim wrote:
" I got divorced 2 years ago from a loser I should never have married. Dated here and there, now I am in this relationship…a real relationship. I really love this man. Problem: he doesn’t know about the MS (it has been 3 1/2 mos.) I spent so much time doing things to build the relationship, and doing things that he may think an MSer doesn’t do- breaking stereotypes, etc. When the time came to disclose this, he’d see me NOT the MS. How have people on the dating scene (with happy endings, please!) disclosed their MS??????? I only did it once, and it was fine. Didn’t bother with others (never saw a future)-" Kim, sorry – this won’t help you but it’s something I wonder about almost every time I read a post on MS & romance. What’s wrong with meeting men & becoming FRIENDS with them? Why do women so often seem to think of men (aka human beings) in terms of "gimme’ a legal lifetime commitment – or get lost"? If you approach men first & foremost as potential future friends (which they should be before you even *consider* marriage…) there’s no need to hide your MS – in fact, there’s no need to hide anything about yourself. If romance subsequently happens, great – your new lover already knows all your bumps & warts. If romance doesn’t happen, that’s also great – because you still have a good friend, you still get to enjoy male companionship and male friends are hands-down *the best* way to meet new men! Chris(tine) F "and always remember – though you may not yet be soaring high above the ground, neither are you laying six feet beneath it." from ‘Theory of Flight’
Response:
kim I just started seeing a man, told him I had a doctors appt, he asked what it was for, I looked him in the eye and told him the truth, he next asked if I was going to die on him…kinda joking…told him yes as the lupus is bordering on critical now (I won’t know how the ms is going until later this week) and he still wants to stick around. Hope this helps, Laura Kim <kimzinn…@worldnet.att.net> wrote in article <n9oo4.1887$LC4.44…@bgtnsc04-news.ops.worldnet.att.net>… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Me again… > I got divorced 2 years ago from a loser I should never have married. Dated > here and there, now I am in this relationship…a real relationship. I > really love this man. > Problem: he doesn’t know about the MS (it has been 3 1/2 mos.) > I spent so much time doing things to build the relationship, and doing > things that he may think an MSer doesn’t do- breaking stereotypes, etc. When > the time came to disclose this, he’d see me NOT the MS. > OK, bad idea (good intentions). > Now as you may have read from rant #1, I have all of this on my mind after > the last neuro visit. I won’t tell him this weekend, probably next- but > here’s my question: > How have people on the dating scene (with happy endings, please!) disclosed > their MS??????? > I only did it once, and it was fine. Didn’t bother with others (never saw a > future)- > Now, here I go. Help!!! > Kim
Response:
Me again… I got divorced 2 years ago from a loser I should never have married. Dated here and there, now I am in this relationship…a real relationship. I really love this man. Problem: he doesn’t know about the MS (it has been 3 1/2 mos.) I spent so much time doing things to build the relationship, and doing things that he may think an MSer doesn’t do- breaking stereotypes, etc. When the time came to disclose this, he’d see me NOT the MS. OK, bad idea (good intentions). Now as you may have read from rant #1, I have all of this on my mind after the last neuro visit. I won’t tell him this weekend, probably next- but here’s my question: How have people on the dating scene (with happy endings, please!) disclosed their MS??????? I only did it once, and it was fine. Didn’t bother with others (never saw a future)- Now, here I go. Help!!! Kim
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