Question:
Hi Sharon, > Probably my high school guidance councellor, Mr. Mulligan. lol! Now > there’s a misguided perv if I’ve ever seen one! He actually told me > after kissing my now fiance, and then he ‘dumped me’ the next day after > the kiss, that kids sometimes have sex with friends, and there’s nothing > wrong with that, so just enjoy it… I don’t know about you guys, but > to me there was something weird about that advice to a young
teen! There’s a helpful guidance councellor…lol. Bet the School Board didn’t know about his advice! > Some people sometimes have perverted minds, and they too can become > authors and publish books… Doesn’t mean they actually have a
clue! How true. He/she obviously doesn’t. Maureen
Response:
KC wrote: > >Ditto for CSI > my addiction (well, one of them) I love the interplay between Grissom > and Sara.
yes, the science interests me a lot too > >Well, as far as I could see, we didn’t see the Lupus person at all. (so > >she could have been severe or not). > and perhaps that is partly what set me off. I imagine that the > writers really don’t know what the disease *looks* like. They just no > it’s debilitating in some cases and so on. The point being of course, > that lupus doesn’t "look" like any one thing. Some patients are > suffering the effects of prednisone, some of us look fairly "normal" – > the only way people really know I have a problem is by observing my > behavior or if I wear my sun clothing. Otherwise I’m just another > middle-aged mom.
Sorry KC. I really meant to say "heard from or more of/by" (not " seen"), even if it was a phonecall from the Lupus person to the cabcentre, a quick "thanks, I’ll be okay, heading to XXX where my parents/relatives live" or something to reassure me that the Lupus person would be okay. > >It did leave me wondering if she made the right decision, not knowing how > >severe her Lupus was, whether she had financial and family resources, > >kids, whether the marriage could have been salvaged, etc, etc. > actually – that was one of the first things I wondered about – she’s > too sick to have sex but she’s not to sick to survive on her own > without him. That seems contradictory to me but there again – this DD > manifests in so many different ways that it could be a valid > situatoin.
Well some people/situations are better off without, then with. But it was left dangling. (in my mind). > >Guess I get too involved eh? > me too – and even hubby who has never been much into t.v. – we watch > CSI and SVU and often watch the reruns to catch the other details. I > love L&O
?? not sure what that is. > : CI too – and find myself almost hypnotized by D’Onfrio’s
??? who is that? > "expressiveness" 
So I always recorded it and watch it again to > catch things I missed while studying his hand gestures and odd little > tilt of the head and…
oh is that the OCD detective? If so, I like that one too. I watch re-runs of re-runs, only stick with it if I can’t remember how it ended LOL > anyway – good to see you posting. I’m taking a break from work for a > few after a light meal. probably make me sick again – leftovers from > something that made me sick yesterday. So why eat it? Because I hate > to see perfectly good food (for someone who has an <snip> stomach) go to > waste.
Me too, but now when in doubt, I toss it. Hope you had better results with the 2nd try. It’s hard to know when it’s the food or the disease, isn’t it? Things have calmed down here, but how have I done that? No variety, stick with the known safe. BORING ! Hugs J PS I snipped a specific word. There’s a nutter on the net who finds that word and invades the newsgroup with posts about too much of it or too little of it. Hope he’s not lurking here. so far he’s left us alone.
Response:
On Mon, 09 Dec 2002 06:01:19 -0500, J <J…@NoChanceMate.invalid> wrote: >I really meant to say "heard from or more of/by" (not " seen"), even if it was >a phonecall from the Lupus person to the cabcentre, a quick "thanks, I’ll be >okay, heading to XXX where my parents/relatives live" or something to reassure >me that the Lupus person would be okay.
I knew what you meant and I agree. Rather than just a disembodied "who’s at the door?" sort of thing. Either way, they avoided having to make any kind of characterization other than "sick person". Still – that will happen in t.v. shows where the number of characters can weaken the plot if one isn’t careful. >> me too – and even hubby who has never been much into t.v. – we watch >> CSI and SVU and often watch the reruns to catch the other details. I >> love L&O
er – sorry. Law & Order: SVU >> : CI too – and find myself almost hypnotized by D’Onfrio’s >??? who is that?
Law & Order: Criminal Intent. Vincent D’Onofrio is a big bear of a guy who is seemingly a genius and just a hair shy of his own level of pychotic behavior. He’s a student of everything. >oh is that the OCD detective? If so, I like that one too.
that’s Monk. I haven’t been able to get into it – though it appears entertaining. >It’s hard to know when it’s the food or the disease, isn’t it?
<nod> and the second time wasn’t too great either. oh well. I told hubby that next time I say I don’t want good food to go to waste – throw it out. >PS I snipped a specific word.
well – that’s got me curious – backchannel that for me so I know what not to say.
Response:
KC wrote: > For those who may not know – Hack is a new series starring David Morse > as a former cop turned cab-driver Good Samaritin (but with an edge.) > I had recorded last week’s episode then finally watched it Saturday > evening. I’ve been sick for a few days and have lost weight again so > I was feeling particularly unattractive and useless and all those > negative things that ring through your head sometimes when you have > too much time to consider them.
I imagine all the above struck a chord with you? > well, one of the guys the "hack" ("Michael") was trying to help was a > jerk of a guy who was rolled by a prostitute. The guy was desperate > to get his wedding ring back so his wife wouldn’t find out. > His rationale for seeing a prostitute was that his wife has lupus so > she’s too sick to have "relations" anymore.
There was a big ruckus on a cancer newsgroup, when one guy asked "how soon can I date?" – his wife was dying of cancer. > That is not a problem for me. But for some reason it really depressed > me (probably something to do with hormones being all screwed up too.)
Maybe. I try to not let TV shows affect me too much, but it’s difficult to not relate in one way or another. I don’t know much about that show but do watch it. Some are based on real situations. ER apparently has quite a number of consultants for the medical side of things, technique and terminology. Ditto for CSI > People are becoming more aware of lupus and it’s showing up in US t.v. > more often – but unfortunately, showing up in its more severe forms > (well, the other would be boring wouldn’t it…) I guess, to be > honest, I’ve been a bit scared lately because things just seem to keep > cropping up – nothing terribly dangerous, just what to me seems a > "progression" of the disease to some extent.
Well, as far as I could see, we didn’t see the Lupus person at all. (so she could have been severe or not). Retribution at the end, she booted him out, but the show I think would have been so much better, if at least there’d been the appearance of the wife, even briefly. It did leave me wondering if she made the right decision, not knowing how severe her Lupus was, whether she had financial and family resources, kids, whether the marriage could have been salvaged, etc, etc. Guess I get too involved eh? Hugs J
Response:
On Mon, 09 Dec 2002 03:18:48 GMT, "Maureen" <BlueEyedMoeNOS…@telus.net> wrote: >share of sacrifice for their mate, at one time or another. I >always thought it was about helping each other in times of >trouble…..guess I’m old-fashioned, or something. >Maureen
yeah the ol’ "in sickness and in health" thing… My ex-Uncle (MHRIP) was divorced by his second wife when he had his first heart attackbecause she "doesn’t like dealing with sick people and going to hospitals". What do people think life is going to be? Maybe she planned on "Live fast, die young and leave a beautiful corpse". His third wife – odd though she might have been – stuck with him to the end.
Response:
On Sun, 08 Dec 2002 16:12:37 -0500, Sharon Perloff <noway…@hotmail.com> wrote: >Maureen wrote: ><snip> >> I can’t believe they would advocate something like this, what >> idiot wrote this book? As if people with chronic illness are >> never well and never have healthy sex, oh brother.
To my knowledge this was a fairly well-known book at the time (this would be late 90s) but it disgusted me so much that I tossed it. The chapter on how teens should stand up to their chronically ill parents was also a winner. I understand the "gist" of that last part – that children/teens shouldn’t be held responsible for taking care of a sick parent. But the implication was that it was unfair for them to be expected to tolerate some of the losses that occur in these situations (like the fact that mom can’t always take the kid out for shopping sprees or trips to the beach.) If I ever see the book – I’ll let you know who wrote it and such. This person really did believe that when a spouse was dying or unable to have sex that it was perfectly reasonable for the healthy spouse to start dating and even *introduce* the "replacement" (not their word, mine) to the dying spouse. Supposedly this comforts the ill spouse knowing that their poor, neglected loved one is still getting some. okay – so the author wasn’t *that* cynical and spiteful – but it was close enough. I suspect the author was a "victim" of a chronically ill spouse or parent. I know it’s hard – Lord knows I worry about my hubby just being flat worn out from worry. And I know my daughter feels like she missed out on some things because of this illness. But they also know that *I* have sacrificed for them on many occasions. off soapbox
Response:
KC, > If I ever see the book – I’ll let you know who wrote it and such. > This person really did believe that when a spouse was dying or unable > to have sex that it was perfectly reasonable for the healthy spouse to > start dating and even *introduce* the "replacement" (not their word, > mine) to the dying spouse. Supposedly this comforts the ill spouse > knowing that their poor, neglected loved one is still getting
some. Oh boy…….It’s almost funny it’s so stupid. So, I guess if any spouse has a low sex drive, without having an illness, the writer would say the same thing. If he suddenly developed an illness that prevented him/her (don’t know why but for some reason I keep thinking the writer has got to be a man <g>) from being physically able to have sex I wonder if his opinion would change? It’s always different when the shoe is on the other foot! > I suspect the author was a "victim" of a chronically ill spouse or > parent. I know it’s hard – Lord knows I worry about my hubby just > being flat worn out from worry. And I know my daughter feels like she > missed out on some things because of this illness. But they also know > that *I* have sacrificed for them on many occasions.
Well of course you have, and I bet everyone here has done their share of sacrifice for their mate, at one time or another. I always thought it was about helping each other in times of trouble…..guess I’m old-fashioned, or something. Maureen
Response:
Maureen wrote:
<snip> > I can’t believe they would advocate something like this, what > idiot wrote this book? As if people with chronic illness are > never well and never have healthy sex, oh brother. > Maureen
Probably my high school guidance councellor, Mr. Mulligan. lol! Now there’s a misguided perv if I’ve ever seen one! He actually told me after kissing my now fiance, and then he ‘dumped me’ the next day after the kiss, that kids sometimes have sex with friends, and there’s nothing wrong with that, so just enjoy it… I don’t know about you guys, but to me there was something weird about that advice to a young teen! Some people sometimes have perverted minds, and they too can become authors and publish books… Doesn’t mean they actually have a clue! -Sharon — ~Integrity~ Integrity is one of the several paths. It distinguishes itself from the others because it is the right path… and the only one upon which you will never get lost. -M.H. McKee
Response:
> >There was a big ruckus on a cancer newsgroup, when one guy asked "how soon > >can I date?" – his wife was dying of cancer.
Understandabe there was a ruckus…you’ve got to wonder how good a relationship this is, if he’s already asking this question. > I picked up a book that was supposed to be for spouses and family > members on coping with chronic illness. One chapter actually > advocated that the healthy spouse have an affair or affairs so they > don’t feel "cheated" out of a healthy sexual relationship. > WTF!!!!!!!!!!!!! (sorry, but at least I only used the
acronym.) I can’t believe they would advocate something like this, what idiot wrote this book? As if people with chronic illness are never well and never have healthy sex, oh brother. Maureen
Response:
On Sun, 08 Dec 2002 07:29:58 -0500, J <J…@NoChanceMate.invalid> wrote: >There was a big ruckus on a cancer newsgroup, when one guy asked "how soon >can I date?" – his wife was dying of cancer.
I picked up a book that was supposed to be for spouses and family members on coping with chronic illness. One chapter actually advocated that the healthy spouse have an affair or affairs so they don’t feel "cheated" out of a healthy sexual relationship. WTF!!!!!!!!!!!!! (sorry, but at least I only used the acronym.) >Ditto for CSI
my addiction (well, one of them) I love the interplay between Grissom and Sara. >Well, as far as I could see, we didn’t see the Lupus person at all. (so >she could have been severe or not).
and perhaps that is partly what set me off. I imagine that the writers really don’t know what the disease *looks* like. They just no it’s debilitating in some cases and so on. The point being of course, that lupus doesn’t "look" like any one thing. Some patients are suffering the effects of prednisone, some of us look fairly "normal" – the only way people really know I have a problem is by observing my behavior or if I wear my sun clothing. Otherwise I’m just another middle-aged mom. >Retribution at the end, she booted him out,
yeah! oh… sorry for my enthusiasm. >It did leave me wondering if she made the right decision, not knowing how >severe her Lupus was, whether she had financial and family resources, >kids, whether the marriage could have been salvaged, etc, etc.
actually – that was one of the first things I wondered about – she’s too sick to have sex but she’s not to sick to survive on her own without him. That seems contradictory to me but there again – this DD manifests in so many different ways that it could be a valid situatoin. >Guess I get too involved eh?
me too – and even hubby who has never been much into t.v. – we watch CSI and SVU and often watch the reruns to catch the other details. I love L&O: CI too – and find myself almost hypnotized by D’Onfrio’s "expressiveness" So I always recorded it and watch it again to catch things I missed while studying his hand gestures and odd little tilt of the head and… anyway – good to see you posting. I’m taking a break from work for a few after a light meal. probably make me sick again – leftovers from something that made me sick yesterday. So why eat it? Because I hate to see perfectly good food (for someone who has an iron stomach) go to waste. Love, kc
Response:
Janers wrote: > The DR Phil show was on last week also. Well, he had women on there > that had problems. HE mentioned that "if they kept this up" they would > get lupus. (think it had to do with depression) Man oh man, I came off > my chair. YOU DO not get lupus like that. I WROTE The show, and told > him so. Doubt if he will get it, but it made ME feel better, knowing I > did.
Did ya ever get a response? Hugs Janers, J
Response:
"ruth tay" <ruth…@mcn.org> wrote in message:
| By the way the Doctors that treated me in 1981 | told me I had another 5 years to live. </snip> The doctors in 1980 told me 10-15 years tops. I have made it 22 years since then and I am doing well considering all the events that lupus has triggered (before and after dx), including organ damage. I feel I live a quality lifestyle with limitations and feel generally well if I adhere to my limits. I would wish everyone here the same quality of life with lupus, heck we deserve it and there is no reason it should be unattainable! IMHO, FWIW! — Shelagh http://continue.to/lupus
Response:
All my patients say to me "No wonder you had a stroke! You work so hard and you must be so stressed!" I never want to say "No" because I tell them to relax all the time. But its pretty hard to ignore raging antiphospholipid syndrome as a cause!. SO I tend to say …"yes, well I have a clotting disorder, but maybe the stress triggered it off now" Its the easy way I think Lyndal "Sharon Perloff" <noway…@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:arujrc$me96q$1@ID-163463.news.dfncis.de… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> KC wrote: > <snip> > > I have often told people about how much stress I was under in my first > > marriage – seven loooonnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnng years of hell. But I wasn’t > > sick. In fact, I rarely went to the doctor for anything. It’s after > > I remarried and my life actually slowed down and became more stable > > that this crap started. So don’t tell me about how stress is my > > problem! Yes, it contributes to symptoms but that’s where the > > connection ends. > <snip> > This is so true, KC! I mean, most people deal with really hard, > stressful things in their lives, but for some reason, if you get sick, > then all of a sudden that’s the reason we’re sick! Then they try to > come up with a reason for their ill-logic to cover their butts, and so > they say that we just couldn’t handle the stress as others do…. I > don’t think so! GRRRR! > -Sharon > — > Clear your mind, relax and float downstream.
Response:
It’s about time you checked in – don’t you know that people worry? Sheesh! Judith, taking it out on my friends "ruth tay" <ruth…@mcn.org> wrote in message
news:ruthtay-2511021721250001@ha-1e-men-p4-m18.mcn.org… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Hi Kcat, > Have had a relapse of viral pneumonia for the past 4 weeks so haven’t seen > much of anything or talked to anyone to find out what is going on in the > world. Most lupus news on TV seems to be only the disaster cases and do > not report that lupus makes us live a different life but a life. Most > everything that keeps me going are the jokes that you all share with me > and the stories that I read on this line. Really do consider it a life line. > My lupus started l9 years ago involving an organ my heart. 19 years is > pretty darned good and during that time I have had a full life with lots > of good things happening. So I don’t go out in the sunshine and stay out > of crowds everything else is just about average living. > We just need to get the message out that we can have a life. That lupus isn’t > a death sentence anymore. [ By the way the Doctors that treated me in 1981 > told me I had another 5 years to live. > Have a wonderful Thanksgiving day and for our lupie friends > outside of the U. S. have an additional one. Hope Butthead gets extra > treats on Thursday, Thanks to everone ruth > In article <pe15uuoa9c1pe048d4b482rsurlvgtm…@4ax.com>, KC > <kca…@newsguy.com> wrote: > > For those who may not know – Hack is a new series starring David Morse > > as a former cop turned cab-driver Good Samaritin (but with an edge.) > > I had recorded last week’s episode then finally watched it Saturday > > evening. I’ve been sick for a few days and have lost weight again so > > I was feeling particularly unattractive and useless and all those > > negative things that ring through your head sometimes when you have > > too much time to consider them. > > well, one of the guys the "hack" ("Michael") was trying to help was a > > jerk of a guy who was rolled by a prostitute. The guy was desperate > > to get his wedding ring back so his wife wouldn’t find out. > > His rationale for seeing a prostitute was that his wife has lupus so > > she’s too sick to have "relations" anymore. > > That is not a problem for me. But for some reason it really depressed > > me (probably something to do with hormones being all screwed up too.) > > People are becoming more aware of lupus and it’s showing up in US t.v. > > more often – but unfortunately, showing up in its more severe forms > > (well, the other would be boring wouldn’t it…) I guess, to be > > honest, I’ve been a bit scared lately because things just seem to keep > > cropping up – nothing terribly dangerous, just what to me seems a > > "progression" of the disease to some extent. > > okay – well, that’s my depressing vent of the day… sorry to be kinda > > pessimistic. It’s not really my nature to do so but lately I think > > I’m not handling "stuff" very well. > > k
Response:
Hi KC, Your positive attitude comes through in your posts. Well, most of them. <g> Sometimes the reality of our situation pushes it’s way to the top, no matter how hard we try to stop it. I think that is natural. I have been feeling a bit like that myself lately. It is a feeling of something impending. I find that I am pushing myself to get the house in order. I am driven to do this in spite of increased fatigue, joint pain and worsening blood work. I wonder too if it is the upcoming holiday season that has me feeling this way. We got an invitation to hubby’s company Christmas party. I suddenly became conscious of my appearance, and felt dread at the thought of making myself presentable. Beauty is only skin deep, right? I know that, but it is bothering me just the same. Call me the shallow prairie chick. Hope things improve for you. BJ-Sk. Canada "KC" <kca…@newsguy.com> wrote in message
news:pe15uuoa9c1pe048d4b482rsurlvgtm3h2@4ax.com… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> For those who may not know – Hack is a new series starring David Morse > as a former cop turned cab-driver Good Samaritin (but with an edge.) > I had recorded last week’s episode then finally watched it Saturday > evening. I’ve been sick for a few days and have lost weight again so > I was feeling particularly unattractive and useless and all those > negative things that ring through your head sometimes when you have > too much time to consider them. > well, one of the guys the "hack" ("Michael") was trying to help was a > jerk of a guy who was rolled by a prostitute. The guy was desperate > to get his wedding ring back so his wife wouldn’t find out. > His rationale for seeing a prostitute was that his wife has lupus so > she’s too sick to have "relations" anymore. > That is not a problem for me. But for some reason it really depressed > me (probably something to do with hormones being all screwed up too.) > People are becoming more aware of lupus and it’s showing up in US t.v. > more often – but unfortunately, showing up in its more severe forms > (well, the other would be boring wouldn’t it…) I guess, to be > honest, I’ve been a bit scared lately because things just seem to keep > cropping up – nothing terribly dangerous, just what to me seems a > "progression" of the disease to some extent. > okay – well, that’s my depressing vent of the day… sorry to be kinda > pessimistic. It’s not really my nature to do so but lately I think > I’m not handling "stuff" very well. > k
Response:
Got room in that boat for another, that is losing weight and not handling stuff well either? Wende "KC" <kca…@newsguy.com> wrote in message
news:pe15uuoa9c1pe048d4b482rsurlvgtm3h2@4ax.com… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> For those who may not know – Hack is a new series starring David Morse > as a former cop turned cab-driver Good Samaritin (but with an edge.) > I had recorded last week’s episode then finally watched it Saturday > evening. I’ve been sick for a few days and have lost weight again so > I was feeling particularly unattractive and useless and all those > negative things that ring through your head sometimes when you have > too much time to consider them. > well, one of the guys the "hack" ("Michael") was trying to help was a > jerk of a guy who was rolled by a prostitute. The guy was desperate > to get his wedding ring back so his wife wouldn’t find out. > His rationale for seeing a prostitute was that his wife has lupus so > she’s too sick to have "relations" anymore. > That is not a problem for me. But for some reason it really depressed > me (probably something to do with hormones being all screwed up too.) > People are becoming more aware of lupus and it’s showing up in US t.v. > more often – but unfortunately, showing up in its more severe forms > (well, the other would be boring wouldn’t it…) I guess, to be > honest, I’ve been a bit scared lately because things just seem to keep > cropping up – nothing terribly dangerous, just what to me seems a > "progression" of the disease to some extent. > okay – well, that’s my depressing vent of the day… sorry to be kinda > pessimistic. It’s not really my nature to do so but lately I think > I’m not handling "stuff" very well. > k
Response:
KC wrote:
<snip> > I have often told people about how much stress I was under in my first > marriage – seven loooonnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnng years of hell. But I wasn’t > sick. In fact, I rarely went to the doctor for anything. It’s after > I remarried and my life actually slowed down and became more stable > that this crap started. So don’t tell me about how stress is my > problem! Yes, it contributes to symptoms but that’s where the > connection ends.
<snip> This is so true, KC! I mean, most people deal with really hard, stressful things in their lives, but for some reason, if you get sick, then all of a sudden that’s the reason we’re sick! Then they try to come up with a reason for their ill-logic to cover their butts, and so they say that we just couldn’t handle the stress as others do…. I don’t think so! GRRRR! -Sharon — Clear your mind, relax and float downstream.
Response:
GO for it, girl – snap away! Judith, feeling mean and muttering DIHL under my breath. "KC" <kca…@newsguy.com> wrote in message
news:llh5uu8p4215l6q0tiueeehhm40v0mvhhf@4ax.com… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> On Mon, 25 Nov 2002 14:04:33 -0800, "J Rogow" > <JRo…@SpammenotNewsguy.com> wrote: > >What a CROCK! And to think I was upset that MOTH had other things > >on his mind and didn’t remember to tape it! > :-) It’s a well-written show – but like most t.v. shows, they go for > the melodrama vs. accuracy sometimes. I’ve always liked Morse – he’s > got that sad puppy look going on. I am sure that some lupus sufferers > have such problems. Just distressing to see it used in this manner. > >> okay – well, that’s my depressing vent of the day… sorry to be kinda > >> pessimistic. It’s not really my nature to do so but lately I think > >> I’m not handling "stuff" very well. > >Sorry to hear that – I guess "snap out of it" would be inappropriate<g>? > unless you mean "snap" as in lose it and start beating people up… > that would be appropriate.
Response:
Hi Kcat, Have had a relapse of viral pneumonia for the past 4 weeks so haven’t seen much of anything or talked to anyone to find out what is going on in the world. Most lupus news on TV seems to be only the disaster cases and do not report that lupus makes us live a different life but a life. Most everything that keeps me going are the jokes that you all share with me and the stories that I read on this line. Really do consider it a life line. My lupus started l9 years ago involving an organ my heart. 19 years is pretty darned good and during that time I have had a full life with lots of good things happening. So I don’t go out in the sunshine and stay out of crowds everything else is just about average living. We just need to get the message out that we can have a life. That lupus isn’t a death sentence anymore. [ By the way the Doctors that treated me in 1981 told me I had another 5 years to live. Have a wonderful Thanksgiving day and for our lupie friends outside of the U. S. have an additional one. Hope Butthead gets extra treats on Thursday, Thanks to everone ruth In article <pe15uuoa9c1pe048d4b482rsurlvgtm…@4ax.com>, KC – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -<kca…@newsguy.com> wrote: > For those who may not know – Hack is a new series starring David Morse > as a former cop turned cab-driver Good Samaritin (but with an edge.) > I had recorded last week’s episode then finally watched it Saturday > evening. I’ve been sick for a few days and have lost weight again so > I was feeling particularly unattractive and useless and all those > negative things that ring through your head sometimes when you have > too much time to consider them. > well, one of the guys the "hack" ("Michael") was trying to help was a > jerk of a guy who was rolled by a prostitute. The guy was desperate > to get his wedding ring back so his wife wouldn’t find out. > His rationale for seeing a prostitute was that his wife has lupus so > she’s too sick to have "relations" anymore. > That is not a problem for me. But for some reason it really depressed > me (probably something to do with hormones being all screwed up too.) > People are becoming more aware of lupus and it’s showing up in US t.v. > more often – but unfortunately, showing up in its more severe forms > (well, the other would be boring wouldn’t it…) I guess, to be > honest, I’ve been a bit scared lately because things just seem to keep > cropping up – nothing terribly dangerous, just what to me seems a > "progression" of the disease to some extent. > okay – well, that’s my depressing vent of the day… sorry to be kinda > pessimistic. It’s not really my nature to do so but lately I think > I’m not handling "stuff" very well. > k
Response:
On Mon, 25 Nov 2002 17:15:16 -0600, "BJ" <B…@sk.nojunk.ca> wrote: >Hi KC, >the top, no matter how hard we try to stop it. I think that is natural. I >have been feeling a bit like that myself lately. It is a feeling of >something impending.
hit the nail on the head, BJ! One of my friends got pretty worried about me last week when I said I can’t shake the feeling that something is fundamentally wrong (iow, not just your standard joint pain/fatigue stuff.) But there it is and I’m still feeling it. It’s making me weepy and irritable and anxious. Not enough to go see the doctor of course…. >thought of making myself presentable. Beauty is only skin deep, right?
Bullsh*t. :-) Sorry, not aiming that at you. I have lost 3 lbs and I look sickly. My daughter dropped by to pick up something today and she said "how much weight have you lost." She got upset ’cause she could see I felt like cr*p and that things aren’t going well. I’m still above 110 but I look gaunt at best. The migraine isn’t helping. >know that, but it is bothering me just the same. Call me the shallow prairie >chick. Hope things improve for you.
why is it wrong to want to feel that we don’t looked like death warmed over? I don’t want to be gorgeous – I just don’t want people looking at me and sizing me up as "sickly" right off that bat. And that’s what’s happening. thanks for listening and understanding.
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Ah cat, I can relate to what you say. I missed "Hack" and usually watch it. Now that makes me mad that I did miss it. I do understand how you feel though. I do the same thing. Wonder if this disease will progress to where things will not be "good" at all. I mean functional things. Showing lupus as a dreaded disease and hurting more and more, I wonder too if this will happen, even if controlled. Some days it is the pits, then the "good" days happen. I can only say this. WE have to hold onto the thought that "control" is the thing here. That we get to the doctor and get this disease under treatment. No matter how it is going to effect us. I know that sounds well and good, and you think Oh heck, she is so positive. Believe me I AM NOT. I have to repeat those word almost every day. I have to push myself to not think OH crap, another shitty day. I mean that. I am optimistic but I get good and down and out too. Sometimes more than I need to be, I guess. The DR Phil show was on last week also. Well, he had women on there that had problems. HE mentioned that "if they kept this up" they would get lupus. (think it had to do with depression) Man oh man, I came off my chair. YOU DO not get lupus like that. I WROTE The show, and told him so. Doubt if he will get it, but it made ME feel better, knowing I did. So hang in there cat, we are in this together. YOU want to vent, do it. We will right with you. Life is a B…. sometimes and well, I guess we just have to be Bitchy too to survive hugs an love ya janers
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On Mon, 25 Nov 2002 14:04:33 -0800, "J Rogow" <JRo…@SpammenotNewsguy.com> wrote: >What a CROCK! And to think I was upset that MOTH had other things >on his mind and didn’t remember to tape it!
:-) It’s a well-written show – but like most t.v. shows, they go for the melodrama vs. accuracy sometimes. I’ve always liked Morse – he’s got that sad puppy look going on. I am sure that some lupus sufferers have such problems. Just distressing to see it used in this manner. >> okay – well, that’s my depressing vent of the day… sorry to be kinda >> pessimistic. It’s not really my nature to do so but lately I think >> I’m not handling "stuff" very well. >Sorry to hear that – I guess "snap out of it" would be inappropriate<g>?
unless you mean "snap" as in lose it and start beating people up… that would be appropriate. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text –
Response:
On Mon, 25 Nov 2002 17:26:56 -0500, "Janers" <rojak…@bright.net> wrote: >Ah cat, I can relate to what you say. I missed "Hack" and usually watch >it. Now that makes me mad that I did miss it.
well – nowadays with 8 episodes a season followed by countless reruns – I’m sure you’ll get a chance to see it. >I do understand how you feel though. I do the same thing. Wonder if >this disease will progress to where things will not be "good" at all. I >mean functional things.
<nod> which is a fear I’m fighting right now quite a bit. >myself to not think OH crap, another shitty day. I mean that. I am >optimistic but I get good and down and out too. Sometimes more than I >need to be, I guess.
we’d be odd creatures if we didn’t. >The DR Phil show was on last week also. Well, he had women on there >that had problems. HE mentioned that "if they kept this up" they would >get lupus. (think it had to do with depression) Man oh man, I came off >my chair. YOU DO not get lupus like that. I WROTE The show, and told >him so. Doubt if he will get it, but it made ME feel better, knowing I >did.
I heard that – I understood what he was trying to say – stress does tend to eat at us and *trigger* problems. but yes, he did word that poorly at best. And I don’t think it would hurt to send him a note. I imagine we wouldn’t be the only ones. I think a lot of the psychiatric world seems to think that lupus is something that happens to us due to stress and poor coping skills. He did mention a couple of other conditions as well though I don’t remember what. But I know my daughter’s therp gave me that "oh really?" doubtful look when she found out I have autoimmune disease. I have often told people about how much stress I was under in my first marriage – seven loooonnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnng years of hell. But I wasn’t sick. In fact, I rarely went to the doctor for anything. It’s after I remarried and my life actually slowed down and became more stable that this crap started. So don’t tell me about how stress is my problem! Yes, it contributes to symptoms but that’s where the connection ends. >hugs an love ya >janers
thanks, hon. I appreciate the commiseration.
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"KC" <kca…@newsguy.com> wrote in message
news:pe15uuoa9c1pe048d4b482rsurlvgtm3h2@4ax.com… > For those who may not know – Hack is a new series starring David Morse > as a former cop turned cab-driver Good Samaritin (but with an edge.) > I had recorded last week’s episode then finally watched it Saturday > evening. I’ve been sick for a few days and have lost weight again so > I was feeling particularly unattractive and useless and all those > negative things that ring through your head sometimes when you have > too much time to consider them. > well, one of the guys the "hack" ("Michael") was trying to help was a > jerk of a guy who was rolled by a prostitute. The guy was desperate > to get his wedding ring back so his wife wouldn’t find out. > His rationale for seeing a prostitute was that his wife has lupus so > she’s too sick to have "relations" anymore.
What a CROCK! And to think I was upset that MOTH had other things on his mind and didn’t remember to tape it! > That is not a problem for me. But for some reason it really depressed > me (probably something to do with hormones being all screwed up too.) > People are becoming more aware of lupus and it’s showing up in US t.v. > more often – but unfortunately, showing up in its more severe forms > (well, the other would be boring wouldn’t it…) I guess, to be > honest, I’ve been a bit scared lately because things just seem to keep > cropping up – nothing terribly dangerous, just what to me seems a > "progression" of the disease to some extent. > okay – well, that’s my depressing vent of the day… sorry to be kinda > pessimistic. It’s not really my nature to do so but lately I think > I’m not handling "stuff" very well.
Sorry to hear that – I guess "snap out of it" would be inappropriate<g>?
Response:
For those who may not know – Hack is a new series starring David Morse as a former cop turned cab-driver Good Samaritin (but with an edge.) I had recorded last week’s episode then finally watched it Saturday evening. I’ve been sick for a few days and have lost weight again so I was feeling particularly unattractive and useless and all those negative things that ring through your head sometimes when you have too much time to consider them. well, one of the guys the "hack" ("Michael") was trying to help was a jerk of a guy who was rolled by a prostitute. The guy was desperate to get his wedding ring back so his wife wouldn’t find out. His rationale for seeing a prostitute was that his wife has lupus so she’s too sick to have "relations" anymore. That is not a problem for me. But for some reason it really depressed me (probably something to do with hormones being all screwed up too.) People are becoming more aware of lupus and it’s showing up in US t.v. more often – but unfortunately, showing up in its more severe forms (well, the other would be boring wouldn’t it…) I guess, to be honest, I’ve been a bit scared lately because things just seem to keep cropping up – nothing terribly dangerous, just what to me seems a "progression" of the disease to some extent. okay – well, that’s my depressing vent of the day… sorry to be kinda pessimistic. It’s not really my nature to do so but lately I think I’m not handling "stuff" very well. k
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